Can I tell you what happened on Saturday? I was so embarrassed. A friend came over to bring me something and I was on the couch, under the bed covers in street clothes... and I had been there for two days like that. I did not answer the door, my kids did. And he approached the couch to speak with me and hand me something (and it was a very, very kind and thoughtful thing he brought me - it was pictures of my kids from school functions - such a nice man). And he said such nice things, too. All while I hunkered down under the covers and wondered if he had had to step over dirty socks and shoes that people tend to leave in the floor when I'm down for the count. All while imagining how he might be taking in my condition and whatever disarray existed (not that I could assess it) in my surroundings. And this after missing a whole day while my family went out and had a good time without me because I was... wherever I was. I feel like I must appear to be a very odd person. Hopefully, those who witness bits that they are not supposed to will simply think of me as eccentric instead of nuts. I hate this. I really do. This should not have happened to me. None of it.