Go ahead and upgrade all the goddamn gadgets in the house. And then you can take care of everything yourself.

A cell phone with no keys and somebody talked the home phone dead? I feel like taking this phone and smashing it with a hammer. Isn't it bad enough that I don't know how to work the fucking movie disk player or the X-Box for Netflix? And no. I CAN'T learn anything new right now because too much of my brain is being used up to keep the jackals off of me. And I'm not going out to look for a payphone. Do we even HAVE payphones around anymore? Go ahead. Upgrade EVERYTHING. And then I won't have to do anything anymore.