Friday, December 19, 2008

Remember the freaky trees that started a really fucked up downhill slide? I went back there this evening. Back to the scraggly trees that are contaminated by the stink of the father and the old hometown. This time I took the pictures.
I noticed something while I was there. Those trees are ugly, weak, and scraggly. Besides being a visual memory stimulator, they are a good representation of my father and my twisted family of origin. And I could chop those fuckers down if I wanted to. All of them.

Because I'm not just prettier than they are, I'm stronger, too.

And so are the trees I prefer. I think they are a good representation of me.
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7 comments:

  1. quacks like a duckDecember 19, 2008 at 10:17 PM

    Bravo! So brave of you to go back and confront the ugliness that got you down. And I'm so glad you were able to find your own strength and beauty.
    I'm proud of you from afar.
    -else

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  2. EnolaDecember 20, 2008 at 9:47 AM

    Woo hoo. Grab your chainsaw girl. You rock! Just go out there and rev it up. Let them know you mean business.

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  3. cornnut32December 20, 2008 at 10:59 AM

    way to go! you ARE prettier and stronger than those trees.

    and i prefer the palms, too, thick and strong and beautiful. and exotic. :)

    thanks for stopping by my blog. i really appreciate your comments--especially the ones about obedience. i am trying to figure out what works for me, as well. i hope someday i can say that i am pretty and strong, the way you do!

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  4. UnknownDecember 21, 2008 at 4:01 AM

    Those top trees seem to represent what my soul is like. What does that say about me, other than that I'm fucked up? And not awfully pretty. Truly, I look like I've been dragged behind a truck most of the time.

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  5. Ethereal HighwayDecember 21, 2008 at 5:43 AM

    Lily, sometimes we look in the mirror and only see what we feel inside. I know the feeling you are talking about. It may not be a pretty feeling, but that doesn't mean that you aren't a pretty person. You have pretty written all over you.

    I used to think I was hideous looking. Do you know what I was seeing when I looked in the mirror? I was seeing what I imagined everyone else must have seen to make them abuse me. You know what I eventually learned? I learned that I was not the ugly one in that picture. I don't think you are, either. I think you rock.

    {{{{{{{{Beautiful Lily}}}}}}}}

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  6. UnknownDecember 21, 2008 at 8:07 AM

    What an inspiring post! I also like the trees you chose to represent you. Standing tall. Rock solid. Beautiful. Withstand lots of crap ;-D

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  7. KahlessDecember 22, 2008 at 6:00 PM

    I love this post.
    Yes you could chop down those trees. Actually you could kick them down.

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