1. The illness I live with is: I don't have an illness. In fact I am very healthy. Suffering episodes due to post-traumatic stress is not a disease. Considering all that has happened to me, how things are sometimes should not be considered 'unusual'. I don't buy into the disease mongering.
2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: The fact that the problems I suffer were caused by trauma was discovered in 2006.
3. But I had symptoms since: ALWAYS. I was born into the hands that caused this.
4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Knowing that I need to be careful in committing to things that might prove difficult when the specified date and time comes around. This used to bother me, but not so much anymore. I plan and I work with things and I never volunteer for anything that does not benefit me or my children directly. And I make absolutely no apologies for that.
5. Most people assume: That I'm perfectly normal. That's because I stay home when I can't present that. And no, that doesn't make me feel lonely. I actually enjoy my own company.
6. The hardest part about mornings are: The days when I feel very uninspired and do not want to get out of bed. That sucks.
7. My favorite medical TV show is: I hate TV medical shows. I'm not usually a very big fan of the idiot box in the first place.
8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: Gotta have the internet. Even though I get pissed off when it gets slow and doesn't work right.
9. The hardest part about nights are: Winding down for sleep. And it sucks when I have nightmares. They don't bother me as much as they used to, but it would sure be better not to ever have any.
10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins: Nutritious food and enough water. I take a few vitamin and mineral supplements, too, but I tailor it daily depending on what nutrients I consume from food sources.
11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Treatments? Again, I am not ill. My 'treatment' is to take the best care of me that I can in any way that I can. And I stay the fuck away from prescriptions, CBT and DBT. Living in reality in this way has proven to be the best 'treatment' for me.
12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: Invisible, of course. Because people can be assholes.
13. Regarding working and career: I have had to make changes for various reasons and I am still adjusting. But at least I do okay. I'm glad of that.
14. People would be surprised to know: Underneath my sweet smile lies a complete asshole. Don't piss him off.
15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: I was born into this so... this question does not compute.
16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: Again, I'm not ill. I have done many, many things that people who have not suffered trauma may or may not have been able to do. And other people do things I can't picture myself managing. Everyone is different and trauma does not define me.
17. The commercials about my illness: I don't know. I'm not usually a big TV person and I don't recall any such commercials even during periods when I have watched more than usual.
18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: This is a silly question in my case. Why would my 'diagnosis' suddenly make me miss things when my problems had already been going on for all of my life before someone stated an opinion about them?
19. It was really hard to have to give up: The unnecessary drugs idiot shrinks got me hooked on. Ignorant bastards. I do not appreciate that they made me a benzo junkie and threatened my health just because no one wants to deal with trauma and would rather pretend it is a disease. This, more than the trauma, sometimes makes me HATE my society and the people in it.
20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Telling the truth. ESPECIALLY to people who don't want to hear it because I like to see them squirm. Sadly, most people who don't want to hear such things are family members and therapists who get some kind of gold stars on their report cards or something if you can just 'get over it'. Thankfully, my current therapist doesn't care whether or not he gets gold stars on his report card. Looks like he will be getting detention in the principal's office. :-)
21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: When I feel especially capable, I do everything I can that needs doing in order to take full advantage of the situation.
22. My illness has taught me: Again with the 'illness'!!! Goddamn, get a better vocabulary already!!! I have learned that my parents are assholes and my family of origin is toxic.
2. I was diagnosed with it in the year: The fact that the problems I suffer were caused by trauma was discovered in 2006.
3. But I had symptoms since: ALWAYS. I was born into the hands that caused this.
4. The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Knowing that I need to be careful in committing to things that might prove difficult when the specified date and time comes around. This used to bother me, but not so much anymore. I plan and I work with things and I never volunteer for anything that does not benefit me or my children directly. And I make absolutely no apologies for that.
5. Most people assume: That I'm perfectly normal. That's because I stay home when I can't present that. And no, that doesn't make me feel lonely. I actually enjoy my own company.
6. The hardest part about mornings are: The days when I feel very uninspired and do not want to get out of bed. That sucks.
7. My favorite medical TV show is: I hate TV medical shows. I'm not usually a very big fan of the idiot box in the first place.
8. A gadget I couldn’t live without is: Gotta have the internet. Even though I get pissed off when it gets slow and doesn't work right.
9. The hardest part about nights are: Winding down for sleep. And it sucks when I have nightmares. They don't bother me as much as they used to, but it would sure be better not to ever have any.
10. Each day I take __ pills & vitamins: Nutritious food and enough water. I take a few vitamin and mineral supplements, too, but I tailor it daily depending on what nutrients I consume from food sources.
11. Regarding alternative treatments I: Treatments? Again, I am not ill. My 'treatment' is to take the best care of me that I can in any way that I can. And I stay the fuck away from prescriptions, CBT and DBT. Living in reality in this way has proven to be the best 'treatment' for me.
12. If I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: Invisible, of course. Because people can be assholes.
13. Regarding working and career: I have had to make changes for various reasons and I am still adjusting. But at least I do okay. I'm glad of that.
14. People would be surprised to know: Underneath my sweet smile lies a complete asshole. Don't piss him off.
15. The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: I was born into this so... this question does not compute.
16. Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: Again, I'm not ill. I have done many, many things that people who have not suffered trauma may or may not have been able to do. And other people do things I can't picture myself managing. Everyone is different and trauma does not define me.
17. The commercials about my illness: I don't know. I'm not usually a big TV person and I don't recall any such commercials even during periods when I have watched more than usual.
18. Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: This is a silly question in my case. Why would my 'diagnosis' suddenly make me miss things when my problems had already been going on for all of my life before someone stated an opinion about them?
19. It was really hard to have to give up: The unnecessary drugs idiot shrinks got me hooked on. Ignorant bastards. I do not appreciate that they made me a benzo junkie and threatened my health just because no one wants to deal with trauma and would rather pretend it is a disease. This, more than the trauma, sometimes makes me HATE my society and the people in it.
20. A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Telling the truth. ESPECIALLY to people who don't want to hear it because I like to see them squirm. Sadly, most people who don't want to hear such things are family members and therapists who get some kind of gold stars on their report cards or something if you can just 'get over it'. Thankfully, my current therapist doesn't care whether or not he gets gold stars on his report card. Looks like he will be getting detention in the principal's office. :-)
21. If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: When I feel especially capable, I do everything I can that needs doing in order to take full advantage of the situation.
22. My illness has taught me: Again with the 'illness'!!! Goddamn, get a better vocabulary already!!! I have learned that my parents are assholes and my family of origin is toxic.
23. Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: This list would be extensive. I'll give a few examples, though: "But that was so long ago" and "You need to forgive" and "You need to focus on the present moment". My response to all of the above? "BITE ME."
24. But I love it when people: I love it when people are just honest and real.
25. My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: I don't do cliches.
26. When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: See my sidebar.
27. Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: I'm not ill and I've been alive just long enough that not much surprises me.
28. The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: He listened, held me, loved me and did not say anything that made me believe that he might have a low IQ or a weak will. He was nothing like the shit in my sidebar.
29. I’m involved with Invisible Illness Week because: From what I've read, it needs another perspective.
30. The fact that you read this list makes me feel: Like an educator.
You speak the truth.
ReplyDelete14. Nope. Disagree.
ReplyDelete25.
MOTIVATION
If a pretty poster and a cute saying are all it takes to motivate you, you probably have a very easy job. The kind robots will be doing soon.
Choir robe...
ReplyDelete