Thursday, January 20, 2011

I'm really struggling right now and I'm trying very hard not to give in to the panic and get sucked down into Crazy Land. And before that can happen, let me just remind myself that I know what has caused this (sex). I shouldn't have done it. Maybe I just can't deal with things like that and that's the bottom line. I don't feel very grown up right now. And yet I have a lot of grown up shit to take care of and I'm having a lot of trouble with it and am struggling to even get organized. I feel like somebody shaved off some massive IQ points and then plopped me down in the middle of someone else's life and I'm trying very hard to figure out what's going on in it so I can do what needs to be done. And the panic is threatening to swallow me whole. I hate feeling like this. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.
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4 comments:

  1. AnonymousJanuary 20, 2011 at 10:26 AM

    It's partly caused by the no-sleep-thing I guess. Irregular sleep, beer and stress. A vicious circle. You overexploit yourself, your body. I really hope you can find sleep.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wanda's WingsJanuary 20, 2011 at 11:00 AM

    You are so strong. You are going to make. ((((Hugs)))))

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ethereal HighwayJanuary 20, 2011 at 9:47 PM

    I wish it were that simple, Mago.

    Thanks, Wanda.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousJanuary 22, 2011 at 6:04 PM

    I am known for being simple and prefering simple solutions.
    I know that simple things are the most oomplicated.

    ReplyDelete

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