Preparing to shelter in place...

I have my appointment with New Guy Tuesday evening. Then Wednesday I talk to Old Guy for what will end up being our last appointment. I'm worried that there's going to be some major fallout after that. I'm hoping not. After all, I have had New Guy to help me prepare so it is a fully conscious decision this time. But I still worry about losing function in the aftermath. Which is why I have laid up supplies and am spending the night cooking. I baked a cake for the children and I'm making a couple of evenings worth of chicken and potatoes to be reheated and I'm brewing a couple of gallons of my homemade iced tea. I scrubbed the kitchen and now have only to mop the floor. I brushed the dogs and vacuumed all the dog hair out of the front hall where it tends to collect. I sent off some money to my boy and I balanced the checkbooks. I gave myself a long overdue manicure and I'm doing the laundry. I don't want to be holed up in the closet and have people milling about looking for clean towels. I even updated my calendar to be sure I don't miss anything important should I find myself in the kind of mess where I can't do anything without a prompt. But I really need the closet floor to NOT be my fate this time. I don't know what I will do if the little one in question breaks away from me to chase down her Dream Mother again. Please, anyone who happens upon me later in the week, if it seems like that is what is happening, please remind her/ me that New Guy loves us and cares about us, will not abandon us, that he likes kids and takes their phone calls and that Rambo said it is okay to call him. Tell her. Tell her Rambo said. Like a homing pigeon who always finds its way home, ALL OF ME knows where this blog is and can read and write in some capacity. Tell her that his cell phone number is in my purse, okay? But above all, please hope with me that there is no rabbit hole in my near future. I really hate it in there. It's hell on Earth.

I think, if I feel good enough after therapy with New Guy, I will stop back at the grocery to get more supplies. Just in case. Yes, it's like I am preparing for a hurricane. Hurricane Lynn. Unfortunately, sometimes it's a Cat 5 and I end up evacuating the area without even knowing that I have done so. Jesus. I feel like a freak.